Things are not always what they seem

I had a sad coverstation with a friend awhile back, she is depressed (though I would have never know) we are new friends so I did not notice anything different about her but I was glad she broke down and told me how she was feeling...I encouraged her to see a Dr maybe get some medication to help balance things and to call anytime she wants or needs to talk.  During our conversation she said to me, "you have it all together, you do so much I feel like I should be able to do all that too".
I am not one to share my own problems, worries etc. I am great at listening, trying to help others, I try not to judge people and I truly feel for them when they are having problems, and I am very good at pretending my life is always great, that I have the balance I need and that I am able to manage everything I need to, but things are not always as they seem.
I told her to be honest most days I feel like my life is spinning out of control, work consumes me daily, I get phone calls at home with things that need to be taken care of when I am not there (that is okay that is part of the job) we have been short staffed for so long that I have been picking up hours whenever needed to a point where I sometimes feel my family has suffered because of it, then comes the guilt, I feel guilty I am not being as much of a hands on Mom as I should be,  I am not able to spend the amount of time I need to with the kids, I feel I am not here enough for my husband, I am so close to finishing school that I want to consentrate on that but again that takes away from everything else, so I just squeeze it in when I can and I don't feel like I am giving it all I should be.  I feel like so much of the FRG stuff I agreed to help with gets laid out on the other leader because I have so much else going on.  Take all that and add to it financial stress and worries, and there are many due to things that happened some time ago but has snowballed down and makes it hard to manage some weeks.  Then there is the upcomming deployment, I support Richards service and know he wants to and will deploy, I have no doughts it will be hard but we will survive it just fine, but it is still stressful I already feel I can't keep up with him here to help me what will I do when he is not here.  My company decided they are not staying here so now I am faced with not having a job or going to the other company, and that issue is a whole other post!  No matter what I choose it will mean less money, but maybe better hours.
I am depressed, stressed and having days I do not want to get up and try again, stress and lack of sleep agrivate my fybromialgia to a point where it becomes almost unbearable, I live each day at about a 6 on the pain level scale, that has become normal for me, when the pain gets worse than that it makes for a long nasty day.  I have such a hard time getting treatment because it means admiting to the doctors that I am having problems and it is so hard for me to admit that.
I still am having such a hard time with the death of my Dad and my friend Becky, I am stuck in the denial process of grieving and cannot let myself move past that, I think if I try to come to accept they are gone, then I will just have a total breakdown so when I start thinkig about it I just have to push it away to deal with another day, a day that never comes.
So there you have I am just human even when I want to pretend I can do everything,  I don't have it all together as much as I wish I did, and most of the time I cannot even take the time to try and figure out how to make it better.